Sunday, January 9, 2011

Why My 8 Year Old is Prepping Me For When He Has a Girlfriend

Okay, so I should mention that my boy knows he's not allowed to have one until he's sixteen, but tonight, he sat me down to have a discussion in preparation for when he has his first girl friend.

The introduction went like this, "Okay, Mom, when I'm old enough to have my first girlfriend, please, PLEASE don't embarrass me!"

.......

Being the evil Mommy that I am, this called for a series of examples, so as I hugged him, I said, "So I'll just say, when she knocks on the door, 'Oh, hi, Honey! He's in the shower-- it's the first time in a week!"

"No!" (giggle) "Not that, Mom!" (giggle) "Don't say that!"

"Don't say that, hmmm?.... Oh! Okay, how about, "Well hi, Honey! Come on it, we can look through these photo albums of when he was a baby-- I have a really cute naked butt shot..."

(Shriek) "Not that, Mom!" (giggle) "Not that!!"

"No?.... How about, 'Oh HI! You must be that girl he's been writing about in his diary!!"

(Shriek) "No, Mom! Never that!" (giggle) "PLEASE don't tell her that!"

"Hmmm.... How about, "Oh Hi! Come on it! Look Honey! It's a GIRL! There's a GIRL in our house!!!"

(Giggle) "No, Mom! ...Besides, we've had other girls in the house before." (Giggle)

"Well phewy. Hmm... How about, "Hi! Welcome. Please have a seat. He'll be out in a minute."

(Giggle) "That's perfect, Mom! You can say that!"

"....and while we're waiting, how about we look through his baby pictures...."

(;

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