Monday, January 13, 2014

Lawyering Ain't No Fairytale

Last night I dreamed that I worked at a fairy tale law firm. I was starting with my first case and was working with a group of four other people.  My job was research.  We had just gone to meet our client but they had a social engagement so we would reschedule for tomorrow.  

I wasn't sure I wanted to accept the case yet. I would need to feel the client out. I could tell guilt from innocence and would not help a guilty person cheat the law system. So my team and I teleported to the hotel we were staying in. 

That was one of the interesting and dangerous things about working fairy tales. You could, by a thought, teleport between worlds. The land between was golden mountains and verdant forests, though you were typically only in them a moment and the ability to walk them was based solely on your belief that you could. If you should ever stop believing while passing through, you would become trapped there and it would dissolve into nightmare around you. 

So any way, on my team, the lead lawyer was a mild villain with a high sexual angst streak. He was interested in seeing his secondary lawyer, a lovely harpy in a pin stripe suit, and his secretary, a female centaur, in a mix up. Fortunately, neither of them were interested. 

I was an intern researcher. The other two were normal people like me, a man and a woman, both in research. I was nursing a Shirley temple while we sat at the bar. The man was on his fifth jack and coke on an empty stomach and I was just thinking he might need to call it quits when our boss, and the owner of the firm (a large man who could have been Ursulla's twin brother), appeared in the bar seat beside me and outright said the same thing. 

My drunken associate, without looking up, challenged his right to say so, and when the boss announced himself, the researcher fell out of his seat and immediately vanished, hiding in the in between. My boss introduced himself and let me know we were having an office party/ meet and greet at the firm and suggested I attend. Then he vanished, as did the rest of my team and most of the attendants of the hotel. 

I finished my Shirley temple first, then walked the golden mountain of between enjoying the silence and sunlight. When I arrived, it was like Disney animated pandemonium. The entire office was size wise comparative to Wolfram & Hart. And unless I'd missed my mark, had broken out into an enormous game of tag. 

There were the obvious match ups- the wolf being chased by the three pigs, Rapunzel was repelling from the fifth floor by her hair, though I couldn't tell by quick glance if she was pursuer our pursuee, mermaids were drowning sailors...though again, quick glance, so maybe they were just dunking them and the pandemonium led me to very fast but incorrect conclusions. 

My harpy co-worker happened to stop for a quick breath as she was running from the lawyer who was intent on following through with his earlier suggestion, when I asked her how one would go about getting out of in between if they ever got stuck there. 

She got a terrified look on her face like she's never considered the possibility and suddenly I was between and the golden mountain turned into a giant boat eating version of my boss (Remember?Spitting image of Ursela...well, now he was the spring image of the giant Ursella) and he was laughing like he planned to eat me. But I wasn't afraid. I was just watching to see what would happen because I was curious. And I realized I wasn't afraid because I recognized that between is what we make of it. We have absolute control over it. 

As I had this thought, the nightmare aspects wore away like turpentined oil paint on a fresh canvas, revealing my golden mountain beneath. And I decided lawyering was not for me. So I curled up to take a nap on my mountain, deciding that when I awoke, I would choose my own path, thank you.

(I will have to take a picture of it once the sun is up because the scanner did -really- weird things to the colors.)


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